Friday, March 5, 2010

Stream of consciousness

I miss blogging! I really do.

I have had several really not so great days lately but yesterday was a good day. It's getting very hard to balance both of my jobs and my sanity. Some days I feel like I can trudge on and get through this season and other times I feel like there is just no way I can possibly continue this way.

I think part of the reason for this is that my caregiving job is getting more intense and more frustrating as the days go by. It is becoming almost rare for me to get more than 15 or 20 minutes to myself without getting interrupted. On nights when I'm trying to cook dinner or (like this week) do my taxes, this can get very frustrating very fast. I have been known to mutter a whole string of un-repeatables under my breath on some evenings.

Other evenings, like last night, are wonderful. I got some "me time" after work and even though I didn't nap I was able to go in my room and spend a quiet 45 minutes alone. I spent some time creating new pictures for Dorothys' communication board and talked to my mom on the phone. Steve came over after work and we watched Survivor and had a "dinner" of spinach/artichoke dip, chips, summer sausage, cheese and turkey. We cuddled and laughed and had a great evening. And through all of that I was only interrupted four or five times, which seems like NOTHING!

Communication is getting incredibly hard. It's frustrating for Dorothy and for me. We are brainstorming new ideas for helping with that because her handwriting is sometimes unreadable. I'm hoping this new picture board is really helpful.

I have some extra time off this weekend (well, more than I expected) and I'm hoping to get some more painting done at the house. I finally just took a break from it and decided to spend some time doing things *I* wanted to do, rather than forcing myself to paint when I REALLY didn't want to. The rest of the remodeling, etc. is coming along INCREDIBLY slowly. I think the friend of my sister's boyfriend committed to this job without really thinking things through. Pretty soon I'm going to start treating him like a contractor and not a friend because at SOME point I'm going to want to move into this house! I'd like there to be walls and a floor when I do that. =)

I've been in a total spiritual rut lately. And by lately I mean, oh... basically for the last 9 months to a year. I finally feel like I'm starting to pull out of that and I'm reading a great book called Sin Boldly. My cousin recommended it to me and after only about two chapters I'm in love with it. I knew it would be good with I turned the first page and saw my life quote staring back at me.

I want to start back up on my 15 minutes better posts. I miss those. And I miss the feeling of consciously making an effort to make 15 minutes of my loved ones' days that much better. It's been two years since my last one and I think it's way past time for some more.

But right now? It's time to get back to work! Happy Friday!

1 comment:

Diaria said...

I've been wondering how you've been getting along. I don't know how you are able to keep up with all that you do. My cats are sometimes more than enough work for me, and they ain't nothing to what you got on your plate!!!!

Anyways, here's to you and the good work you do!!!!

How is the painting going along? How much you get done since the 6 walls we got one coat done on? I still can't believe how much work painting is!!!! Yours is the only painting I have ever done, so it was an experience!!!